Sunday, September 13, 2009

Terrible Art Revue Part Deux

I spent most of last night looking up pictures for some of my other fandoms. Some of them were undeniably awesome. Some were unspeakably terrifying. And some were... Violinist of Hameln, I guess? But by and large, most of the art was pretty good!

Until, that is, I decided to search for RosenkreuzStilette. Now, don't get me wrong. I love the fans. You guys are pretty cool, on the whole. But there is some not good artwork out there. Letty has, of course, already pointed this out, but I would be remiss if I didn't do a little commenting of my own. Let's go on with part two of the bad fanart roundup, shall we? Now 50% shorter and with 60% more Freudia.

Disregarding the fact that I would have been perfectly content not knowing such a thing as the Furry Doll Maker even existed, this image is just plain unflattering. Freudia has the skin of a Simpson, the eyes of Sonic, and the hands of a Disney character. And for some reason, she's incredibly sassy about the whole thing. Now, I realize this is the fault of the Furry Doll Maker and not JigglyPuffGirl, but that doesn't make the sight any less frightening. I feel like lightning should strike and horses should whinny uncontrollably every time I type "Furry Doll Maker".

This is supposedly a picture of Schirach Fühler. I tried standing like this once. I dislocated my hips and had to go into the ER. And then I noticed that there was in fact a seam in the picture itself. As though part of it came out undesirable, so Black Shaddow Walker just decided "eh, nobody'll notice" and cut it. Perhaps the stock picture of bricks didn't line up correctly under that ridiculous blur filter. I like the Carmen Sandiego coat, though. It really sheds some light on the true motivation of the Black Cross Organization: They just want to sing a cappella with the RosenkreuzStilette. It's admirable, really. Unfortunately, there's just not much room in all-male groups for female voices. Still, I say do it, Rockapella!

I'm sorry, Justin. I promised myself I wouldn't pick on you, but I couldn't let this one go without comment. (If you don't have a deviantART account, here's a direct link to the picture, since I don't believe you'll be able to see it otherwise.) In this picture, either the laws of gravity don't exist, or Zorne and Trau have been using an awful lot of hair spray. You can do so much with the way hair hangs! Zorne's would likely be lying flat, and Trau's could be dangling in front of Zorne's face in some sort of enticing manner. It's funny that only a few minor modifications would make this picture so much better to me. It still wouldn't be great, but it would be better than it is now. Keep it in mind the next time you give this a shot. I'm glad you've stopped running the Emboss filter over all your pictures, at least.

Oh my god what is this I can't even. Every time I think I've seen everything wrong with it, I notice something else and I just laugh even harder. Unless you work in a boob factory, this is bordering on not safe for work. I really hope this was intentional on the part of the artist, but I sincerely doubt it.

Since I like leaving things on a good note, have this. It's the best piece of RKS fanart I've ever seen, and in fact one of the most beautiful fanarts I've seen in general. Admittedly her chest looks a bit odd, but do you fault the tiger for his stripes? No, because the tiger wouldn't be able to understand you and he would end up eating your face off. So what I'm saying is that Freudia's boobs are tigers. I think. The point is that you should give the artist some props.

There it is: Part two of the terrible art revue. Significantly shorter than the last one, I realize, but Letty's the one who knows where to find all the bad stuff. If you happen to find your art here and you were genuinely offended by the things I had to say, I apologize! But maybe next time, consider drawing better.


  1. Sorry about my drawing. It's just that I'm still trying to work on my anatomy, and I'm happy with criticism.

    And I will agree, that last picture of Freudia is just amazing.

  2. I'm glad to hear you're taking criticism well, Justin. You're slowly improving, and I mean that sincerely. And to be entirely honest, that picture is better than anything I could draw.

  3. I wish I could the last one as my wallpaper, but I can't since I don't have my own computer... T_T

  4. That Frankenfran pic is freakin excellent! Nice find!

    "So what I'm saying is that Freudia's boobs are tigers."

  5. For the last pic, I had to wait coming back to home... But it was worthy.

    The giant boob one was... Scary, to say the least. Awful. T_T

  6. Well, at least we have other great artwork to adore. The Dollmaker and Schirach ones are so awful, and the boob one definitely needs to be worked on.

  7. @Justin:
    Then why did you bother the artist of the Schirach one to continue making it? And again you mislead/deceived people of the Rosenkreuzstilette series to get fanart...

  8. Scratch that last part... >_>

  9. I thought he would do good, as I had seen his gallery, which was great. I'm not really sure why. 0_o The only problem is the colors and the outfit. (Tan hair instead of blonde, Brown-red coat instead of red, points on coat)

    Also, speaking of Schirach, anyone notice that Schirach bares a small resemblance to a bat? (How her hair looks, and the points on her coat)

  10. Really like the last Freudia one ^_^
    And she's not even Grolla... xD
    The "giant chest"one..not so much. Don't get why guys are so obsessed with these lumbs of flesh, I prefer smaller ones on girls :/

    And yep, Justin, you did improve some. It takes a while tho, just keep in mind gravity and things like that!

  11. I find it ironic that the only "decent" piece is from pixiv.

  12. LOL. Good point, Lion. Pixiv, being the Deviant Art of Japan, tends to require one to wad through heaping piles of garbage to find a good pic here or there.

    I mainly use an imageboard to find good art, then latch onto the artist's site, often following his own links. That usually nets some good stuff.